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Showing posts from July, 2014

tinderriffic

Ever wondered what goes through a girl's mind when she's on Tinder? ugh, shirtless shot, gross - NOPE first photo is you drinking beer and pulling a finger sign? what are you, 20? - NOPE oh look you have a motorbike. and you ride it sometimes. look, there it is again. and again. ummm, do you have a face? oh there it is. - NOPE just one photo. just one? do you think you're so attractive that one single photo is enough to catch my interest? - NOPE oh look you're smiling! you have a nice open face. nice to see your eyes. no profile tho. hmmmm. ok but only because you smiled. - YES naked torso - NOPE naked torso - NOPE photo with bikini babes, seriously? why would that attract me? is it supposed to act like a reference? - NOPE naked torso - NOPE tank top with generic brand like elwood - NOPE four photos, none smiling - NOPE oh another smile! yay! AND a bio! AND you have interests apart from sport and alcohol. i'm actually swooning. - YES bio has snapchat

fridge magnet poetry, or "what happens when you reduce the english language to a select few words"

Fridge magnet poetry, in my experience, always comes out sounding either deeply emotional... shake me to the shadow only to show me my weakness ...somehow bitter... she felt eternity trudge                                 pound                                 and fall through her like drool over a honeyed winter death aching with his cool beauty, a black symphony of woman worshipping man but men are delicate and always they run ...dauntingly erotic... as languid tongues part peach petals delirious love milk soars frantic over smooth white skin like summer rain ....or plainly silly... want tiny gorgeous butt must eat less chocolate ...perhaps it's just me. In other news, I made my first ever batch of home made marmalade tonight, with oranges from my friend's tree. Poetry and cooking go together very well... the little cook makes a sweetly bitter produce burns it just a touch