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autumn sunrise

Autumn. Six in the morning and I've been wide awake since four. Tried to reclaim sleep for a while then the rooster crowed around five and my thoughts turned to the sunrise. I haven't watched one in a while, since I lived near the ocean several years ago and worked every second week in the desert with 5am starts. I prefer sunrise over sunset; it is so beautiful and so fleeting, analogous to life.

With a coffee I came and sat in the garden. We are on a slope so I can see the ground fall away below me, the dam to my left and in front of me a tree, wearing her yellow autumn colours which are visible even in this still-dark of the morning.

For a while - too long - I look at my garden and start to plan. An entertaining area to my left that overlooks the dam. A small wall to carve out an area of flatness. Curves that skate around the contours, bringing a sense of order. Then I wipe the slate clean and try to keep it more natural with just grass, garden, no walls of stone...

The bir…
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tinderriffic

Ever wondered what goes through a girl's mind when she's on Tinder?
ugh, shirtless shot, gross - NOPEfirst photo is you drinking beer and pulling a finger sign? what are you, 20? - NOPEoh look you have a motorbike. and you ride it sometimes. look, there it is again. and again. ummm, do you have a face? oh there it is. - NOPEjust one photo. just one? do you think you're so attractive that one single photo is enough to catch my interest? - NOPEoh look you're smiling! you have a nice open face. nice to see your eyes. no profile tho. hmmmm. ok but only because you smiled. - YESnaked torso - NOPEnaked torso - NOPEphoto with bikini babes, seriously? why would that attract me? is it supposed to act like a reference? - NOPEnaked torso - NOPEtank top with generic brand like elwood - NOPEfour photos, none smiling - NOPEoh another smile! yay! AND a bio! AND you have interests apart from sport and alcohol. i'm actually swooning. - YESbio has snapchat in it - NOPEoh crap i know …

fridge magnet poetry, or "what happens when you reduce the english language to a select few words"

Fridge magnet poetry, in my experience, always comes out sounding either deeply emotional...

shake me to the shadow
only to show me
my weakness

...somehow bitter...

she felt eternity trudge         
                       pound 
                               and fall through her
like drool over a honeyed winter death
aching with his cool beauty, a black symphony of woman worshipping man
but men are delicate and always they run

...dauntingly erotic...

as languid tongues part peach petals
delirious love milk soars frantic
over smooth white skin like summer rain

....or plainly silly...

want tiny gorgeous butt
must eat less chocolate

...perhaps it's just me.

In other news, I made my first ever batch of home made marmalade tonight, with oranges from my friend's tree. Poetry and cooking go together very well...

the little cook makes a sweetly bitter produce
burns it just a touch

the ass-end of a rabbit

The first time I ate rabbit was in Germany. I was fifteen and on school exchange in Gottingen. We went out to a warm, dark restaurant and I ordered the rabbit because it seemed unusual. It was rump, and it tasted like rump. In fact it tasted exactly like the ass-end of a rabbit and I didn't enjoy it much.

Today I was reading Nigel Slater's Kitchen Diaries cookbook and encountered a recipe for rabbit. Not far from my little house is an Italian grocer, and next door is an Italian butcher. I knew he'd have rabbit - he has everything.

I had all the ingredients for Nigel's recipe: rabbit, tarragon, onion, white wine and cream is added at the end. Then I spoke to the butcher himself, who said you can't go wrong with red wine, tomatoes, garlic and basil.

Never one to choose a single option when there is room for two, I made them both.

Both are fantastic! I quite impressed with myself.

Excuse me, it's dinner time, I must go.

it'll defy all logic

First ride on my new road bike, a Giant Defy 2 (2014). It was SO much easier than kicking along on my old hybrid. Felt like I hardly had to work at all, most of the way.

So...why did it take me the same amount of time to get home, while burning the most calories I have ever burnt, with the highest heart rate I've had since I was in my early 20s??

I don't know! Maybe the sea breeze was harder. Maybe I'm just out of form (it is the first time I have ridden home against the sea breeze this year). Maybe it was because it was so hot. Maybe I pushed myself too hard passing a guy along the freeway - twice! (He took off past me again both times - obviously doesn't like being beaten by a girl. I laughed and figured if he needs to pass me to feel like a big stwong boy then he can have it, because all I was doing was seeing how fast my new bike can go.) I usually pace myself along there but didn't bother today.

I suppose I was also a lot more cautious, given that I was clipp…

la via scura

There are two paths ahead. (Only two?)

Do you take the path of never knowing?

No.

You step onto the wide, green, sweet smelling path that is lined with flowers and water.

Nourishing, beautiful, wide enough to spread your arms. It ambles away into the distance becoming steadily darker, less certain, leading you slowly towards a jagged cliff face and nowhere to turn back. You know this, but still you move forward, for you can see an exit just up ahead, open and safe and clear.

Past lessons tell you that it will not be so clear by the time you arrive. It will be overgrown, lined with brambles and thorns, branches that scratch at your eyes and heart and whip your legs until they are almost too weak to carry you forward. A hard path to walk. A high price to pay.

But you'll walk it with such strength and love and light in your heart, such jubilation at your bravery and memories so feather-light that you are sure they will lift you through the thorns and sail you into the clouds long en…